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Fed Up

I've had this scratching feeling on the inside since I started my studies through The Institute for the Psychology of Eating. The feeling that leaves me so deeply moved to say something is the feeling of being fed up. I'm fed up with all the lies we've been fed and manipulated to believe around food and body, I'm fed up with mass producing companies claiming to be healthy, low fat diets, eating less/exercising more protocols, and focusing on weight loss first before focusing on what's happening inside of us. I'm fed up with a lot, but most of all I'm fed up with people hating their bodies, beating themselves up in the gym, starving themselves, not diving deeper into themselves, tricking, playing, restricting, measuring, weighing, pinching, poking, and dismissing themselves. When will we all get what life is really about? We teach what we need to learn....

I'm at fault too, no one is immune to this way of thinking and behaving, not even me, especially not me. I have been through physical, emotional, and verbal hell against myself when it comes to my body and the way I eat. You name it, I've tried it, all in the name of "something greater". Ask me about any diet, I've done it and I've put countless people on programs just like them, all in attempt to finally be happy. That's the goal isn't it, To happy? Though we continue to learn and progress in our knowledge everyday, this I know for certain:

Happiness is not in the future

Happiness is not in the extra 0-25lbs you want to lose, happiness is not in the gym putting on muscle, it's not in the new shiny car, or in a pair of skinny jeans. Happiness doesn't come when, happiness comes now. This is what we've been made to believe, that happiness will only come when .... you fill in the blank.

I've been so skinny and still hated my body, I wanted to kill myself at one point I hated me so much. I may have been ultra thin but it wasn't because I was the poster child of health (even though that's what I claimed to be). I would workout twice a day and claim to be this big health nut, but then go and sniff coke and throw up everything I ate at the end of the day just to keep my slender figure and my inner world numb. Does that sound like happiness? What kind of life is that? Do you want to live like that if it would mean you were this unrealistic size or shape?

I'm fed up with people believing that every skinny person walking around is the most happy, vibrant, sensual, loving person they can be because more often than not, this couldn't be further from the truth. Does that mean all skinny people are unhappy? Of course it doesn't, that's not what I'm saying, but I am saying that whether skinny or bigger, if you hate your body now you will hate your body then, regardless of it's shape.

There will always be something for you to pick apart when it comes to your body, always. Every time we flip through a magazine or turn on the tv we are reminded of how unworthy we are, not matter what you look like. There's always someone who's thinner, prettier, richer, taller, shorter, more symmetrical, has nicer hair, bigger muscles, a small nose, straighter teeth, whiter teeth, nicer clothes, bigger house, nicer car etc... The list goes on. When will you finally be happy?

Happiness is not when, happiness is now. If you live a life of comparison, or with your appearance being your most important goal, you've completely missed the mark and your life is as shallow as a bed pan. When will we all get past the surface and get deeper with ourselves, with our lives?

I am not immune to it either, just so you know that I know that I'm not. I'm just fed up with an unending strive for something that never comes. I'm done letting the world dictate how I should look, think, feel, act, or talk. I'm fed up with conforming for the sake of pleasing people who don't truly care for me and who have no interest in seeing me for who I truly am, which is more than my body. Your body is an expression of you, it doesn't define you. If your identity is solely in the way you look, it's time to grow up and open your eyes. Life is more than just creating your appearance, life is about creating happiness as you are right now.

 

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Success Series: Part 2 of 3

Continuing on with the next 5 pieces of advice to becoming and staying successful in work, in relationships, and in life. I have gotten so much inspiration over the past few weeks from the people I'm surrounded with everyday and am so thankful.

 Best seller

  1. Live Each Day With The Purpose To Be The Best

Chad Smith, Senior Vice President of Catch Engineering, and a personal client of mine said this, “If you want to be successful, be the best at whatever you do. It doesn’t matter what you want to do, you could be a janitor, that doesn’t matter. But if you’re gonna be a janitor, aim to be the best damn janitor there is”. Life seems pretty bleak when there is no purpose. Purpose yourself to do what you love for work. It’s your choice to do whatever you want to do. If you hate your job, work somewhere else, it’s really that simple. You will never want to be the best you can be working at a job that you don’t love because you aren’t working with a purpose, you’re merely working for a paycheck only.

Time is Money on Red Keyboard Button.

  1. Be Willing To Put In Time

One of my favourite quotes was said by Estee Lauder, founder of one of the most widely known women’s skin care line, said “I never dreamed of success, I worked for it”. If you want to slack off in life and never put in any hard work, you don’t deserve to reap the benefits that come from putting in an effort. I’m not saying you have to run yourself to the ground each and every day, but you will have to determine within yourself to put in countless hours at work. One of my clients, as a partner in her firm, mother of 3 small girls, and one of the hardest workers I know says this: “Pick one goal and go after it with everything you have in you. If that means you have to work 80 hours a week to reach that goal, that's what it means. And you have to be willing to sacrifice things along the way, like your time”.

New Opportunities - Green Pushpin on a Map Background.

  1. Don’t Say No To Opportunities

This is a piece of advice I got from my client who has been with me the longest at my current place of work. He doesn't talk a lot, but when he does, it's worth shutting your mouth to listen. “Never turn down opportunities, but on the same hand you have to build consistency. You don't want to be jumping from one thing to the next, job after job. If I look at someone's CV and they haven't built any amount of tenure, I'll toss it to the side”. You have to be willing to do things that you don't feel like doing, but actually should be doing that contribute to your success, especially in the beginning. Work now to play later.

Business Team Giving One Another High Five

  1. Celebrate With Others When They Succeed

One of the most helpful pieces of advice I’ve received is this; “There’s enough to success to go around, and just because one person is successful doesn’t mean you can’t be successful. There’s enough pieces of the pie to go around for everyone”. When you trample over people to become more successful, you will fall, and you will fall hard sooner or later. This is the big secret, success is not a fight between people, or being better than someone else, it’s about working with people to create something greater than you could create on your own. Team up with people, feed off each others victories, and celebrate in someone elses success.

mind, body, spirit, soul and you

  1. Don’t Neglect Your Health

Thomas C. Corley, author of his #1 bestselling book, Rich Habits – The Daily Success Habits of Wealthy Individuals, says “Wealthy people are healthy people”. When people are physically healthy, their productivity levels remain high because they aren’t fighting off sickness or disease. If you are constantly missing work because you’re sick, you are making less money than those who are working. Generally, people who are successful have educated themselves and have learned that physical activity and a diet that's high in nutrients will help them succeed at work and in life, whether they're thinking about that consciously or subconsciously. Eating clean and exercising are your life insurance. Utilize them.

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